A word of warning...

... I'm in a bad mood. With that out the way, I can now continue to explain what I've actually been doing with my time since I last wrote. What I sadly haven't done is write up my entries from the Poland trip, but I'll get around to it this week. I hope.

So, from last time I wrote. The German course was Friday as well, which was marginally better than Thursday, but admittedly, still sucked. I went home and mucked around in my room for a bit (read: I read my blog roll instead of cleaning) and eventually put on some rice to cook, to make sushi. Finally used that packet of sushi rice that's been sitting in my pantry for ages. It's a pity I used it on exchange students, but whatever, making sushi is fun! I made corn fritters to use as filling because they're so much better than just using the kernels - they've got that extra salty crunch that only comes from something fried. And they're delicious. Sd came around and really just watched me make the sushi rolls... I told him he was there to entertain me while I worked. He shyed away from trying to make one until the last roll, when he finally saved into peer pressure (mine) and managed a sushi roll. Sure, it was a bit messy, but not too bad for a first attempt. It was only going to be eaten by the Erasmus group, anyway, so I didn't much care. He went home to get changed and I made some more rolls and got ready for the party; aka, made sure I looked presentable. The day had been hot so it was nice to have a shower afterwards. I'm not used to such sticky heat.

Anyway, I can't say much about the party. I wasn't there for very long, thankfully, because I was bored. I felt like whenever I was with Sd, a lot of people I'd usually talk to wouldn't come up and say hello. I can understand what Mi was saying about that, now, but I still don't really get why. Anyway, I sampled bits of various food, felt rather sick at the end of it, and was pleased to finally go. We didn't stick around to hear whose food was voted the best. We'd just missed a bus and didn't feel like waiting 55 minutes for another, so we walked instead. Note to self: never trust Sd with directions. He told me he knew where he was going, but managed to take us on the longest possible route to get back. I was tired and honestly just felt like screaming, or better, curling up on the median strip and getting some sleep. He insisted on walking me home, which I guess is a nice move, but I really just wanted some alone time. He actually walked directly past his own house to walk me home. So it was nice to be home, on my own, and just fall into bed. Really, it was an unspectacular night.

Funnily enough, a few days later I received an email from Eurobiz (one of their group mails) to say that significant amounts of damage had been done to the place and they were expected to pay a 360 Euro fine. Apparently furniture was broken, chair were thrown into the neighbours' yard, and the KFC next door had reported their damage to the police. Eurobiz were politely saying they weren't going to point fingers, but would like all exchange students to chip in 5 Euro to cover the damage. Um, hello? Not fucking likely. As if I'm going to dig into my pocket to contribute to a terrible party that I'd already paid to attend, not to mention brought a large volume of food to. I think they should have pointed the finger at the idiots who got wasted and trashed the place. Hell, I think they should have told the police. No matter how drunk you are, it's never acceptable to start destroying things for your own amusement. So, really, I think they should have made the right people pay and left everyone else alone. I think a few people probably feel the same, which would be why I've gotten a second group email about everyone chipping in... ha. Just bite the bullet and abuse the kids who did it, and maybe then you'll get someone to cough up some cash. Or maybe I'm just getting old and sour. Probably both. ;)

Anyway, Saturday and Sunday I finally had the opportunity to have some down time. I'd told Sd that I was getting suffocated by being friends with him and needed more space, that I don't want to hang out with the same person all the time, and he respected that. So I finally caught up on my blog roll (which has grown to 54 blogs followed), drank lots of tea, and cleaned my room. Hell, I even cleaned the bathroom and the kitchen for good measure, because I wasn't convinced that they'd been cleaned during my absence. So I finally felt like I was home again, and it was good.

On Monday the German class started again, and we met our second teacher - she seems pretty nice. Monday night I ate too much and then went for a walk. I didn't feel like going out to the Spanish night, which prompted a call from Sd, who didn't understand that I just wanted my own space. Ugh. Last week just blurred into one day, really. Tuesday our class finally lost the five students who belonged in Mittelstufe, and whoa, was I glad about it. After the pause we had just six in the class, which was actually pretty brilliant. Unfortunately, on Wednesday the remnants of the other G2 class joined ours, which left us with 18. Frankly, while it's nice to have new people, 18 is far too many. Most exercises don't have 18 examples, so chances are people miss out. And we're never allowed the time to do exercises by ourselves, which honestly just means that I'm not learning. I can't learn from hearing things: I have to do them myself, in a reading-based format. So when other people answer before I've decided what my answer would be, it's pretty useless as a form of education. I have a feeling I'm going to have to actually start studying this term. It'll certainly be the first time in my university education that I've needed to do so.

So, at some point this week, possibly Tuesday night, I told Sd that I wasn't happy with hanging out so much and that I just wanted to be alone sometimes. He has no concept of "space". Even my best friends at home are people I don't see every day, so the idea of hanging out constantly with one friend here is just roo much. We don't even have anything in common, and he's just not a good friend like other people are. It took him a pretty long time to get the picture, which probably wasn't helped by my mediocre German. But I managed in the end, and I thought that he'd finally understood what I was trying to say. I've since reconsidered, because he still wants to hang out constantly, but after tonight I think maybe he gets it a bit more. But I'll get around to that.

So, every day I had German class. Monday and Tuesday I was lazy and ate in the Mensa, which was enough to put me off of their food for another few weeks at least. Otherwise I was enjoying having time to hang out by myself. On Thursday C took photos of me with a few other people in our class, for use in various propagandha by the International Office. I was the token white girl, which amused me to no end. I hope the photos end up being used somewhere, even if I'm not photogenic, simply because it would be funny.

On Friday afternoon I got a call from Sd, sounding kinda concerned, and asking if he could come over. So I said yes, thinking that something was wrong. And it turns out that nothing was, but I'd just worried for 45 minutes (he took ages to arrive) for no reason. The truth of it was that he'd missed me, and was speaking about it with B, and she told him that he should just call me. So we hung out and chatted for a bit, and established that we were going to still be friends and that everything was ok, but that I just really didn't want to hang out so often. So I felt pretty glad about that. I guess he just panicked, thinking that we weren't going to hang out and that he'd be lonely. Kinda understandable when you're so far away from home.

Anyway, the real highlight of the week was Saturday. I got up later than usual (probably 8am, what a shock!) and ate breakfast, etc. before catching a train to Munster. There, I met up with Mt and T and their kids, for the train to Rheine. It sounds like they've had a hellish beginning to their year here, but they're definitely troopers and have managed to survive it this far, to their credit. I certainly couldn't survive in a two-room apartment with 4 other family members. So it's a pretty admirable feat, though I'm glad to hear that they've got another place lined up. It'll be a relief for everyone, I'm sure. Anyway, it was absolutely brilliant to see them, and to catch up on what's been happening. I didn't really have anything interesting to say, because really, life here is pretty quiet. But that's ok with me for the moment, while I'm definitely needing some space.

Anyway, H and her husband picked us up from the train station in Rheine. Their house is gorgeous, kept in the traditional style, and with a stunning backyard. They've got fruit trees and red currant bushes, the latter keeping the kids pretty well occupied. I probably would have joined them, being something of a berry fiend myself, except that the possibility of adult conversation in fluent English was simply too good to resist! Honestly, it was brilliant. I didn't realise how much I missed having discussions about anything other than the life I'm living, because that's all I seem to talk about here in Pb. I have friends here, but they're not the sort of friends with whom I can transcend daily life - they're not like my friends in Adelaide. So really it was just completely refreshing to talk about issues that don't directly relate to me. Plus I was seated at a table with four very interesting people, which always helps!

H and Ma had really outdone themselves with the lunch. There were grilled rounds of zucchini and eggplant, strewn with salt and oregano, which were my personal favourite. I'm a sucker for eggplant! There was a Spanish tortilla, made according to Jesus's recipe, which meant that it was absolutely delicious. Sacrelicious, perhaps. Plus Moroccan-style carrots, a green salad, and slices of baguette with a delicious garlicky sundried tomato dip. Followed by apricot teacake with a sprinkled sugar crust... oh, divine. Finding good apricots is always such a ray of sunshine, because none ever live up to the ones I feasted on in the summers of my childhood. And these were perfect; sweet, rich, collapsed fruit under a layer of soft vanilla cake. I know that I'm not supposed to eat these things, but really, it's worth the later stomachache!

Ma spoke to me about potentially helping out somehow with a course he takes next semester. The topic is Australian English, so hopefully I can be of some use... I've got his email address so I'll write tomorrow for some further information, but it sounds pretty awesome. And it would definitely look good to be able to say I've worked for the Uni Pb. But honestly, I'm just interested in what the topic material is, because I'd like to know more about the language I speak, and why it's different from other peoples' English. And why people from far-North Queensland speak with the most awful accent in the country... save anyone who has come from New Zealand, of course. ;)

About 5pm we headed back. I was able to transfer directly to a train to Hamm, and then only have a 15 min wait for my Pb train to leave, so my journey back was pretty swift. I was tired, so sms'd Sd to ask if it was ok to postpone dinner until today. He agreed, so I got to crawl into bed early, and really, I couldn't have asked to a better end to an awesome day. I finally got a good sleep, only waking up once, so I woke up feeling pretty awesome this morning. I stayed in bed until 7:30am, even! And then I did some laundry, etc. Checked lots of things on the internet, talked to A, and emailed J our potential itinerary for December's travels. I'm so excited about travels... it's going to cost a fortune, which already has me in a state of mild heart attack, but I'm sure the parents will lend me some more money. Something like going skiing with my sister in the Swiss Alps and staying at an Ice Hotel in far northern Sweden are something that will only come once in a lifetime.

So, I spoke with Sd around lunchtime, and he said he was hungry. I told him to eat something, because dinner wasn't going to be until after 6pm. Of course, when he showed up, he was complaining that he was hungry, because he hadn't eaten anything. I offered him something to snack on, but he declined. Then, while I was cooking, he proceeded to complain that he was hungry, and actually had the nerve to ask why the food wasn't ready, waiting for him, when he arrived. I told him I wasn't his goddamn wife and he could wait. I just thought that was so damn rude! And I asked why he hadn't ducked into the city to get something to eat, because it's only a 15-minute journey by foot each way. And he said something about not having time, which was completely a lie, because he'd been in the library all afternoon. I honestly began to think he was just stupid. He's not, but honestly, sometimes he's pretty clueless.

Part way through dinner it became clear that we'd run out of things to say. It was painful, awkward silence. He said he found it funny when we had miscommunication, and I said I hated it. I can't think of anything worse, because I'm not a patient person, and I lose my cool when I have to explain myself over again. It makes me think that the other person isn't listening in the first place. I eventually told him that he was acting like we were a couple and that it made me feel uncomfortable, and that maybe I should just do some study that evening. He took the hint and left, and I was so glad to see him go. I was still angry about the whole thing. I just don't want to see him every day, and he doesn't seem to get that at all. And hey, if someone else is cooking me dinner, I'd shut up and be appreciative. He's never cooked anything for me, so I don't see why he was complaining. I'm still angry about it.

Anyway, I think that's enough venting for now. I'm going to just give up on today and go to bed. I think it's the best way to deal with it.